There is an ancient Egyptian saying: to speak the name of the dead is to make them live again.
The Egyptians believed each of us has a ren, a name, and that the name is part of the soul. As long as your name was spoken, you were never truly gone.
So families visited the tombs of their loved ones. They brought bread, flowers, and incense, and read the names carved on the walls out loud.
Even strangers passing by were invited to say a prayer, so the dead would be remembered and nourished.
With Day of the Dead and All Souls just behind us, I've been thinking about how rarely we speak our ancestors' names anymore. A grandmother. A great grandfather we never met.
The people whose courage and love made our lives possible.
This is something I've practiced for many years. In women's spirituality circles, we introduce ourselves through our lineage: I am Barbara, daughter of Diana, granddaughter of Rachel.
In Zulu tradition and many others, people also speak their lineage when they introduce themselves, calling on the names of the ancestors who came before them.
Each time we say these names, we bring our ancestors into the room with us.
A Ritual to Speak Their Names
You can do this tonight, at your kitchen table or by a window.
✦ Light a candle.
✦ Place a glass of water.
✦ Beside it and a small offering: a flower, a piece of bread, or something a loved one enjoyed.
✦ Say the names of your ancestors out loud, one at a time.
✦ If you don't know their names, you can simply say, "To all who came before me."
Then introduce yourself through your lineage: "I am “daughter of..., granddaughter of..." or "son of..., grandson of..."
Go back as far as you can. Notice how it feels to stand with them behind you.
After each name, share one gift you received from them.
A recipe. A sense of humor. Strength. Faith. The courage to start over. Be open to receiving information even if you do not know the details.
Then notice if anything else comes up. Sometimes we inherit patterns along with gifts: worry, scarcity, silence.
You can say, "I honor you, and I release what is not mine to carry."
Close by thanking them. Let the candle burn a little longer as you sit in their company.
If speaking your ancestors' names stirred something, an ancestral clearing or a reading can help you understand what they are asking of you now.
With love,
Barbara